I’ve been thinking these past days about a lot of things and one of those is if I’m going to quit my job or not. I’ve been feeling down lately and I’m afraid that it’s affecting my performance at work. It’s like I’m burned out and I’m losing the drive to push through.
I just can’t do this anymore. No matter how hard I try, I just can’t shake off the feeling that I can’t do anything right. No matter what I do, nothing goes right.
My life’s a total mess. I thought I was beginning to find myself but I realize that I’m still lost.
I don’t want anybody to know how much I’m suffering right now but everyday, this burden is eating me up inside. I want to cry for help but I’m too afraid that I will get shut down.
Sometimes, I just want to disappear. I’m thinking, maybe the world will be a better place without me. All kinds of things are running through my mind. All kinds of scenarios on how I can just be gone.
I’ve been on a rollercoaster of emotions this past months. I feel happy yet sad at the same time. How, I can’t fully describe. That’s just how I feel right now.
Maybe, my depression is setting in again. There are times that I just want to just be invisible. To just be gone.
A lot of people will tell me that I should be strong. To push harder. But what if I don’t have the will to hang on?
As of now, I just don’t want to be here. I want to get away. I want to go as far away as possible and be alone.